Talking about the relationship over text

Status conversations, expectations, definitions, concerns — none of it belongs in a thread. The moment a difficult topic enters a text chain, it begins to mutate. Messages get re-read obsessively. Tone gets misinterpreted in both directions. The conversation gets screenshotted to a friend who hasn't seen the context and who will pour gasoline on it. What might have been a ten-minute, totally manageable conversation in person turns into a 48-hour slow-burn text argument that leaves both people exhausted. Phone call or in person. Always. This isn't an arbitrary rule — it's about matching the weight of the conversation to a medium that can hold it. Text strips out all the softening signals: the facial expression, the tone that says 'I'm not angry, I'm just sad,' the hand that reaches across the table. Without those signals, the words are doing all the work, and words are blunt instruments for anything that matters. If something is important enough to say, say it somewhere it can be heard properly.